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If I'm feeling particularly outgoing, I go with more casual friends so I'm more free to meet people and do my own thing. Person B: With friends, overwhelmingly — though keep in mind I have sex with most of my friends.

I find sex parties most enjoyable when I'm around at least some people I know and have been intimate with but don't feel committed to sharing the entire experience with one person.

Woman A: Different parties have different rules about this. Some are very strict about staring at people playing, and you can speak to a playroom monitor if someone is making you uncomfortable.

Some places even have quite private little cubicles or corners to go with your partners. Other parties are all about the exhibitionism.

Person B: Well, two things: if the sex party is good, there will be enough going on that you'll hardly be the center of attention.

Also, it's perfectly acceptable to ask folks not to watch you! I'd also add that finding a more discreet spot at the party is helpful too.

Woman A: The most important thing to know is about the party's consent culture, and how serious the organizers seems about it — there'll be rules posted everywhere, maybe a little talk as you enter the party, people monitoring the play areas, etc.

It's usually a good sign if there are at least a few women among the organizers as well. Good parties will often have some system of screening guests even if it's a short chat with the organizers, or a requirement that people come with a friend.

It's difficult to generalize about finding good parties. Google is your friend. You can also go on Fetlife, the kinky social network, which allows you to look at many of the events in your geographical area.

This isn't a guarantee that things will be safe or well-organized though, so follow the guidelines above! Person B: I started my own [parties] out of frustration as I found there to be a lack of safe and sexy play parties.

Ultimately, word of mouth is best — find your most consent oriented sex party going pal and ask them what parties they like!

A good party will communicate rules around consent and how they deal with consent violations beforehand as well as having designated folks helping keep the space safe and be there to help if a situation should arise.

Woman A: I'd say check it out, but keep your expectations low. Aiming to have the best sex of your life your first time is unrealistic and will probably lead to disappointment.

Go with the expectation of having a good party and meeting some interesting people — people are generally more interesting and open-minded than at a mainstream party.

Person B: Keep an open mind, enter with no expectations, be respectful, and don't take yourself too seriously. United States.

Type keyword s to search. Today's Top Stories. How old are you? Woman A: Twenty-six. Person B: Twenty-four.

How and when did you first start going to sex parties? Image via the Thrillist. And it might not be because it's a bright, new, scary world for you.

Perhaps you've moved to another country, even just a new city. Regardless, the rules stay the same Despite what far too many people might think, these are not places where any randy individual can walk in, pick the first warm body, and do whatever they want.

They are safe-havens. And what they don't want is someone barging in with no respect. How do I get in? The first step is a simple one These are relaxed, vanilla gatherings of like-minded people whether BDSM, fetish, swingers etc.

If you're not sure, just wear what you would put on for a nice night out to the movies or dinner. There is also no scening or playing, so don't expect anything to happen.

At most, someone might try some teasing, but it still needs to be consensual. You go there, mingle, hang out, and talk. It's where you let your personality shine through and have your name be known among the regulars.

Join a couple of those and you'll most likely get an invitation to another event. Where can I find these magical places? Word of mouth is a common method, but if you don't have any kinky friends in-the-know, the internet is your best friend.

Here are some examples Unfortunately, this social networking group gets a bad rap. You can get the "bad" pervs and abusers See why people have munches, screening process, and references before an actual invitation?

These groups are the ones you want to get into. Search through Fetlife for parties in your area. That's why events often give significant discounts if they even do admission at all to women.

It's easy to say "sex" and have a truckload of dicks show up. Women are far more cautious and careful about what parties they attended.

That's why, if you're a dude, you need to either:. Build yourself up within that inner circle. NOTE : the site may be free to join but there are extra fees for contacting couples directly etc.

I think this is to help weed out people who aren't serious. I haven't tried this one yet, but they do have an events page. I'm also assuming it has a similar vibe to Fetlife.

If anyone has extensive experience, you can also drop me a line with what you've come across. It's not to say you shouldn't try them, just be more careful where you end up going.

You can check out some interesting apps here:. These are just the straight up kink clubs the operate either on weekends, bi-monthly, or monthly depending on a number of variables.

In places like Tokyo, Berlin, and Amsterdam, there is always some sort of "pay to get in" party. NOTE : not all of these are sex-acceptable events.

Many of them are just kinky costume parties. Make sure you check their list of rules first. We've already covered Munches, but what about the straight-up sex-possible events?

Do your research. There's a large variety out there, so, either find their website or contact the organizer directly so you can learn more.

Follow the rules. Look at their website or contact the organizer to learn the dos and don'ts If you're not comfortable with the rules There are a million more out there.

Tend to hygiene! We're talking shaved, waxed, plucked, southern man-scaped, perfumed, cologned, hair washed, body washed, stocking with no runs, clothes prepped, teeth brushed etc.

This includes making sure your undies aren't the ones you wear on a Sunday while watching Netflix. Stay sober. These are not places to get raging drunk and throw up in the bathroom while crying how much you love your friends.

These people are mood killers, AND, more importantly, unable to give proper consent. We decided to throw a hot sex party and invite a decent and modest girl along with the hottest col Eva Shanti.

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We asked Georgia Di Mattos, co-founder of home testing sexual health app iPlaySafe , to discuss the benefits, misconceptions and etiquette at sex parties — and share advice about how to pick the right event for you:.

The adult lifestyle is expanding, and the adult partying scene is growing fast, says Di Mattos. How long they last depends on the party.

Some parties may be held in country houses and last for the weekend; others are on cruise ships and may last a week or two. However, people are not free to have sex with anyone they want.

There are a few things to be aware of when attending sex parties for the first time:. Before you go, check the party website for the dress code.

There are plenty of misconceptions about sex parties, some of which may put people off or give unrealistic expectations about what to expect.

Here are some of the most common:. You often see fully dressed people hanging around and talking to a fully or half-naked couple.

No one will make you feel awkward if you decide to keep your clothes on. There are countless reasons why people might choose to go to sex parties.

Whatever the reason you choose to go, always be conscious about safety and safe sex. These types of parties are a great option if you are thinking of attending your first party but not yet fully committed to doing so.

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